Wednesday 10 July 2013

Miss Havisham's Nightgown and Other Knitting Fables


When people asked Marta where she came up with such design concepts, she just smiled and said that like all true artists, her sources of inspiration were many and varied: tangled present ribbons after present opening on Christmas morning; yarn after her cat had played with it; the few childhood Slinkys she had that always immediately got tangled; her hair if she forgot to use conditioner in the shower....





Elaine felt knitting should be pure art, above such paltry considerations as darning in ends or sewing side seams.





After Abby switched her major from English literature to clothing design, she put her literary studies to good use by using them as a source of inspiration, such as in her latest effort, which she called "Miss Havisham's Nightgown".





Sometimes Robin and her boyfriend John liked to indulge themselves in a little Robin Hood and Little John role play in a nearby forest. John had made them a rustic trailer as shelter for their time in the woods and Robin had made knitted green coats and feathered hats and bought tights for both of them. They'd thought their friend Marian, who was a history major and who loved Ren Faires, might like to join them for some swordplay, but when they asked she'd only sniffed and said their props weren't period accurate.





Jordan now knew that his high school counsellor had been full of it. After all, Jordan had carried out that guidance counsellor's advice to the letter. He'd followed his heart, found work he loved, and given his creative impulses free rein, and he was still bowed down by existential angst.





Portia had not been sure what one wore to compete in the Abominable Snowpeople's "Snow Princess" competition, but she really hoped she had come up with something appropriate, because it was her understanding that unsatisfactory Snow Princess contestants got eaten for breakfast, and she had some uneasy suspicions about what exactly was entailed in the winner's "prize".





Dominique was having one of those days when she just couldn't wait to show off her latest knitting project, her latest crochet project, her latest beading project, and the latest hair and makeup techniques she'd learned, all at once. Hey, it wasn't her fault she was so multi-talented.





Bianca was on a one-women mission to destroy all those old crocheting stereotypes. She was determined to show everyone that granny squares could be bad ass.





Shelley and Brian just had one of "those" marriages and they couldn't bear to be apart. Their wedding song was "Every Breath You Take" and they'd put a "love toilet" on their wedding registry (although they hadn't gotten one and had had to save up for one themselves). They liked to wear matching outfits, but that didn't seem to bring them close enough, so Shelley made them a real togetherness outfit out of pieces from several of their old sweaters.





"I have devised a strategy to make you take me back to the animal shelter so I can be adopted by someone who respects my dignity or at least isn't completely insane. It's called 'Operation Howl'."

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