Knit Simple has released their Spring & Summer 2017 issue. Let's have a look at it.
Pattern #1, Double Seed Stitch Pullover. It's a Christmas tree skirt with sleeves.
Pattern #2, Halter Top. This thing is like a crocheted Newton's Cradle. If gives me the feeling that if I lifted up one tassel and let it swing back in place, it would send a compression wave through the other tassels, causing the tassel on the other end to swing out as well, and that the end tassels would just keep swinging out in turn until forcibly stopped.
This seems to be pattern number three, though there's no Ravelry page for it. I can only say that there's more to making jewelry than fastening a hunk of yarn to a cord and a wooden object.
Pattern #4, Round-Neck Tunic. This isn't so much a top as it is a grocery shopping bag with pretensions.
Pattern #5, Sandi Prosser. And here we have a table runner with pretensions.
Pattern #6, Chevron Blanket. Classic ripple afghan.
Pattern #7, Pillow Trio. Very simple but effective striped pillows.
Pattern #8, Blue/Green Pillows. Fun and fresh.
There isn't a Ravelry page for this one either, but it seems to be pattern number nine. It's a good marriage of yarn and stitchwork.
Pattern #10, Pom Pom Pillows. I rather like these, but I would skip the pom poms unless the pillows were intended to decorate the dormitory lounge at Clown College.
Pattern #11, Striped Throw. Very fresh, summery colours.
Pattern #12, Waffle Rib Blanket. This is okay. I think the design's fine, but the colours are detracting from it, as they have a dingy, drab look.
Pattern #13, Drop-Stitch Tank. The stitchwork is rather pretty, but I have my suspicions about how well this sits when the wearer isn't contorting herself to make it look good. Also, any woman who wears this will likely want to wear something underneath it, and layering tends to be the last thing one wants to do in hot weather.
Pattern #14, Eyelet Crop Top. This is rather cute, and it sits well. A lot of women wouldn't care to wear such a cropped length, but it can always be lengthened.
Pattern #15, Long-Sleeve Tunic. This isn't so bad. It's baggier than I like, but it does drape well.
Pattern #17, Back-Pleat Pullover. Thanks to the titular back pleat, this thing is huge. I can't even joke that it's good for carrying groceries, because it would be difficult for all but the most muscular of people to carry as many grocery items as this sweater would hold.
Pattern #17, Buttoned Wrap. This isn't such a bad piece. It can be worn in several different ways, including with the buttons running down the front so that it has the look of a cardigan.
Pattern #18, Boy's Cardigan, and pattern #19, Girl's Cardigan. Basic but cute and serviceable.
Pattern #20, Girl's Jumper, and pattern #21, Boy's Overall. Like the cardigans above, these are dead simple but cute and wearable.
Pattern #22, Baby Bonnets. Do people put bonnets on their babies these days? I suppose these aren't too bad for a contemporary take on an old-fashioned style.
Pattern #23, Frog Booties, and pattern #24, Puppy Booties. Not bad at all.
Pattern #25, Halter Top. Just as sweaters should not look like afghans or grocery shopping bags, halter tops should not look like pot holders with strings.
Pattern #26, Tote Bag. You know what, Knit Simple? Granny square chic is not a thing.
Pattern #27, Mini Skirt. Poor Mitzi had such high hopes of making an impression on the cheerleader crowd at high school when she left the house that morning, dressed, as she thought, for the clique she hoped to join, but as it turned out, her hopes (as well as most of her self-esteem) were crushed long before lunch.
Pattern #28, Triangle Poncho. Honestly, this pattern, as well as so many of the patterns in this issue, could have been taken straight from the back pages of some seventies homemaking magazine.